So I’m a slacker… it’s been nearly a month since I’ve updated. I have no excuse other than the fact that I am boring. I almost had my writing knack back (the one where you rhyme everything I guess) too but then I slipped back into taking my zoloft. Yay. These pills basically numb me to the point that I don’t really feel much of anything. No anxiety or sadness for no reason which is definitely nice, but it also seems to kill any positive feelings as well. And creativity. I was just thinking today about all of the oh-so-droll fake news stories I used to write back in the day, along with short stories or even a freaking blog every few days. Now? Nothing… I sometimes feel like I’m just this shell of a person going through the motions. As a result of not wanting to feel like a zombie anymore, I started weaning myself off of these pills several weeks ago. I started taking 1/2 pill instead of a whole, then after awhile I took 1/2 only every other day instead of every day. It seemed to be working too. I had all these ideas in my head for what to write about, started to really enjoy reading again (I’ve had a short attention span as of late and get bored easily), and most importantly started feeling – just feeling. Then of course – true to form – I get slammed back into reality just when everything seems to be going along smoothly, with no real worries. Don’t want to get into why now, so long story short I started taking these damn pills again and now it’s back to being a husk. I suppose one positive side-effect though is anxiety completely kills my appetite, and I’ve been looking to shed a few pounds so there’s a window of opportunity…
Posted on June 15th 2011 in Journal
