Memoirs Of J

I heard a saying that if you can’t sleep at night, it’s because you are awake in someone else’s dream (roughly paraphrased).  So… either that’s true and I am extremely popular and thought about by …oh like tens of people or so (excuse me while I try to suppress my cynical-laden chokes), or I am having a new bout of anxiety and / or depressed worrying.  Yay!  I really thought I was over this shit and really have no reason to be either anxious or depressed, yet alas, here we are and I can’t pop zolofts like skittles or eagerly chug entire (or even any) bottles of wine at the moment.  Fabulous.   You know, I think if it weren’t for, um how to say this – people – yeah if it weren’t for other people I think  I would be pretty calm in general.  Unfortunately here we are with no realistic or effective way to deal with my troubling thoughts du jour, so I’m just trying to prevent myself from thinking at all by partaking in worthwhile activities such as watching Teen Mom or Hard Core Pawn.  I figure these programs must be paralyzing my mind at least a little bit.  I mean Amber’s storyline alone is enough to make any reasonable person self-lobotomize, right?  So what’s the matter with me… that’s the mystery.